Well, I did have a salad. Go me.

We will, however, draw a veil over the freshly baked bread slathered with butter that I had beforehand. Sigh. Well, it was there, and it would have been rude not to eat it. Fresh bread is yummy.

The salad seemed to be garnished with quite a large portion of chicken and bacon – but, that’s only garnish, so that doesn’t matter, right?

My old man used to have a theory that if you had lettuce with anything, it became a salad, and salad makes you loose weight. Fish and chip salad? No worries,

I am still having real problems getting out of bed in the morning. It really is like I have a split personality. In-bed-me just doesn’t care. In-bed-me just turns off the alarm clock, rolls over and goes back to sleep. It is a problem. I will have to think on it.

(Did get my morning routine done today, all the same, though…)

Discussing diet etc with a colleague today, and they we of the opinion that I wasn’t getting enough carbohydrate in my diet. This is true. Bread, potato and pasta just don’t feature. Is this a real problem? I will have to investigate.

Bread I don’t keep in the house. If I have bread, I just want to eat it. Sandwiches, bread and jam, bread and marmite. Ooo! Marmite. How can some people not like marmite? Marmite is just delicious.

As for potatoes, they take too long to cook. Now, don’t get me wrong, I like cooking and, if I say so myself, I am a pretty neat chef. However, I just can’t be bothered to cook for one.

Also, the best ways of cooking spuds are also the most fattening. I do however like all forms of potatoes – except one. Baked potatoes! God how I loathe baked potatoes!

Actually, that’s a lie, I am perfectly capable of eating a baked potato if someone feeds me one. I am polite like that. I will however, have to choke it down. They are just flavourless balls of mush surrounded by just as flavourless leathery skin – and what little flavour they do have isn’t particularly nice…

Oh no, I hear the baked-potatophiles cry, you can put all sorts of things on them to improve the flavour… Well, yes, indeed you can, but, so what? You could spread butter and cheese on a cork tablemat, but it wouldn’t actually make it good to eat. The undeniable fact is that whatever you put on a baked potato to improve the flavour would taste better if it didn’t have baked potato all around it – and I have never yet heard of a filling for a baked potato that wouldn’t taste infinitely better between two bits of bread.

And you know the real bummer? Being a chap of a certain stature, whenever I go to a barbecue or any sort of meal that involves baked-bloody-potatoes, the hostess always comes up and, with the air of one bestowing the riches of the world, thrusts a pap-laden dish under my nose with the words “I’ve saved the biggest one specially for you.” Oh, goody…

When I win the lottery, I am going to buy the Spud-U-Like chain of restaurants, just so that I can have the pleasure of closing the damned torture chambers down!

Anyway, so that’s why no carbs. I was, however, eating some Bulgur wheat in my salads. Maybe I will have to re-institute this.